am i completely a looser??

before that; i would like to say Selamat Hari Raya to n balik kampong everyone! ;)

okay, here how the story goes;
just now, we got this advance microb TEST,
a few day b4, it was plant anatomy TEST.
and next 4 day, there will be a plant biotech TEST

since last week, we got this TEST n TEST, so i don't really focus too much on any subject,

which mean only study what the nearest TEST that around da corner
coz too many works n lab report to do. n yup, i do exhausted until now.
morever, all the subject need my attention (owhh please, every subject claim me for many topic!)

so, i juz flipped through my notes last night,
have a discussion with my frens. n it all turnout to be okay.
i can answer the memories most term in the note.

and yet i do remember the step in the host defense or whut eva.

however, i felt like a complete loser

it's quite sad. it's just the first test. n why?

i got my heavy migrain

its turn me like crazy or mabuk man

too much pain n blurring until finish the test

i do remember what i has been answer during TEST
juz because of silly careless mistakes, which i can't really accept it.

ok fine.. it seem i try to give silly reason

a good student didnt gv much reason ok!!!!

i would like to say sorry to my animal anatomy n physiology lecturer coz i don't really focus on ur class just now

i'm too sad. ;(
n thanks too because u decided to dismiss the class early..

mucho gracias dr chong

i still glad that my friends are there to cheer me up. ;)
" faez, janganlah macam ni. aku xsuka tengok kau mcm ni"
" faez wehh, kau kenapa? x sihat eh. nk ubat?" *smbil tunjuk ke arah dirinya*
" faez, apsal tetiba kau xde mood? aku pun teruk juga la hari ni, ngn presentation sebagai. "
" faeza, kenapa ni? aku eh penyebab kau mcm ni ek? "
thanks dude! haha. xde masalahnye dgn korang. i just can't accept myself just now. ;(

i have to move on! there still 1 test to go. hopefully i can do it better.
n pray for the bezt all of u too

i'm just too stress for these few week. hopefully next week will be better.

for sure>>> already home sweet home

smile

whatever happened,

keep smiling Faeza

u know u can handle those things right.

there are people who will support u no matter what.

n just believe Allah is always there for u.

in fact, always near to you.

" Dan apabila hamba-hamba-Ku bertanya kepadamu (Muhammad) tentang Aku, maka sesungguhnya Aku dekat. Aku kabulkan permohonan orang yang berdoa apabila dia berdoa kepada-Ku. Hendaklah mereka itu memenuhi (perintah)-Ku dan beriman kepadaKu, agar mereka memperoleh kebenaran." (Al-Baqarah, 186)

perempuan yang suci

Perempuan yg suci...
adalah perempuan yg dijaga oleh Allah...
tidak sedikit pun Allah membenarkan...
mana² lelaki ajnabi yang fasik menyentuh dirinya...
walaupun hatinya…
kerana Allah teramat mencintainya…
tetapi andai wanita bergelumang...
dengan cinta lelaki yg palsu imannya...
dimana Allah utk m'jaga anda?

Allah seakan melpskan anda...
kepada seorang manusia...
yang lbh byk mengecewakan anda...
jika Allah datangkan kesedaran dlm dirimu...
supaya meninggalkan cinta seorang lelaki yg munafik...
Itu bermakna Allah mahu mengambil anda kembali...
untuk dijaga-Nya...
dilindungi…
mengapa masih ragu-ragu?
kekuatan usah ditunggu tapi harus dicari...
hargailah di atas kesempatan yang Allah beri…


“Sebesar-besar dosa adalah dosa yang dilakukan ketika kita rasa berdosa melakukannya.”

aku bangga melihatmu derita dalam perjuangan…
dari melihatmu gembira dalam kelalaian…
aku bangga mendengar tangisanmu krn pengorbanan…
dari melihat tawamu dlm pengkhianatan…
aku bangga andai dikau mati di medan kebenaran…
dari hidup dalam kesesatan...
tapi jangan lupa…
muliamu bukan pada pangkat, harta dan rupa...
tetapi kerana Iman dan Islam…

a confession

"it can be nearly impossible to stay open minded, calm and forgiving when faced with difficult and stressful situations, and taking out my frustration on others is a natural part of this cycle of negativity."

this is something i naturally believed most of my childhood.
and although now I don't agree with it at all, this is the kind of person i still can be when faced with a situation that angers me.

i admit it: i am a person, when faced with difficulty and stress, who lashes out on the ones closest to them.

you could call me an adolescent with a body chock-full of raging hormones, a jerk, or simply "normal" for acting this way.. but there are no valid excusesfor exercising angry feelings toward someone else who has done no wrong. even if they did do wrong, who am i, in my self-righteousness many call 'the Ego', to tell them off?

i just wanted to share that with you, and maybe it will inspire you to admit the way you have been for many years is wrong, and that every man, woman and child is truly, without-a-doubt, equal.

(i apologize for getting preachy on you.)

i need to learn what to do in difficult and stressful situations instead of lashing out. i need to rewire this hard-drive and change. i have been doing it, slowly but surely, and i will continue to do it until my way of thinking is beneficial to everyone around me.

thanks for listening,

am i over-thinking???

em where to stat this entry ya

i have never written about the previously listed things,

per se, but i like them...

and you like them...

so we obviously have something in common.

sometimes, i can't help but wonder
how am i supposed to plan the next few years of my life

when i don't have any clue what's going to happen?

how can i make safe decisions and still be so blissfully happy?
because, to be perfectly honest,

it's about time I'm happy with my life.

nothing is that perfect...

da perfectionist in me quivers at the thought of university.

i know what i want to do,

i just don't know where for sure, and i don't know where i will be living,
second year of in university is a big deal, right?

you have to make choices.

and these choices will affect "the rest of my life."

(this probably those in last year i guess)

and these choices are scary as hell!

i need to keep my life balanced,

but it will be so difficult, especially since i now have many duty

and an average to maintain

if i wanted to cover all the messy in my life

i think i'm over-thinking things.

i'm just scared, guys.

these next many months

will require a lot of coffee,

love, meditation, yoga, therapy and hope.

(i'm joking about the therapy.)

let's begin!

faeza

korang rse marah????

eeee rse na marah2 bolihh..

ishhh ta elokk marah2 t batal poce..

elehh biar la kan.. sah ni mlm plak u kata batal poce

tipu ae,,, ta elok3... ishh jgalah dri yer di jln rya

sebelum tu nak ckp siang3.. ta mo wktu mlm dahh

okay thu tak nape kita rase marah2

kowang thu ke pe maksud marah tu

yela.. sikit2 kata ni yg ak marah2 niyhh

haishh hangin je rse bila u olss kata gitu

ermm gini lah akak2 adek abg3 yg kt luar sne

x guna marah2 ni klo u olss suma na thu

wat penat lidah mulut ja wehh na marh3 org niyh.. bazir air liur jahh

aishh bolan pose niyhh.. errm

daripada kita duk marah2 otg de baiknya kita tenang2 jer

tenang tu kan siat yg sgt terpuji gituw.. marah ni plak sah3 la kwnnya pak sEtaN

ala.. yg shabat beknya iblis..

erm da mmg jd keje diowang da punmnnti manusia cm we olss ni masuk neraka

nauzubillahh.. minat dijauhkan ye.

kita mgkin tlalu mrh sgt2 ngn kwn kita. based on true story niyhh.

n kita na apa2 lah kan.. ada je ketidak puasan atinya

ade je yg kita rse ta betul la ini lah itu lahh

hurm rsenya suma de feeling3 gini an..

yela kan mane la kita x marah

kita wat ni dia kata ini

kita kata A btul dia plak kata B yg btul

haishhh suma lah jd salah

dah tu kita na slahkan spe

x kanla mk cik sbelah umah jiran bibik kit aplak an

pastu n marah kwn kita tu ker

ha,, marah lahhhh.. huk3

tp igt la wehh.. mrh2 ni x der abesnya

x de uung x der NOKtah.

KLO KITA MARAH SKRAG PUN nnti bila bdn da sejuk sesejuk frezer

erm tatkala jiwa kaco da jd tng. ermm ok je nnti

cm n lah pe kaa klo tyme nga tenang2 senang ati tu an

cecuba lah kita duk sesowang pastu kita pikirkan smula pe yg kita wat td..

agk2 la kan ikut kewarasan manusi yg bnama homo sapiens ni kan

betul ke hape yg kta wat tu

mmg la kan x leh na nafikan

sumtyme tu mmg rse marah yg amat

sum people said that lepaskan mrh tu akn wat kita rse puas..

ye lakan spe je ta puas na mghentam ank org

gaya tuh sah2 da slalu wat kann

huk3

yela rse lega kowt pas mrh2 balik kt dia

tp dri sudut yg bebeza la kan..

x ke kita pe yg kita wat tu ta bpe btul pun

its tottalay wrong ok.. msti igt marah bukan stu penyelesaian yg baik

Daripada Abu Hurairah, bahawa seorang lelaki berkata kepada Nabi SAW: “Berikan daku wasiat.” Baginda bersabda: “Janganlah engkau marah.” Lelaki itu mengulangi soalan itu beberapa kali. Baginda tetap bersabda: “Janganlah engkau marah.”

abang-abang dan adik-adik semua, pernah x kita ambil faedah

daripada riwayat al-lmam al-Bukhari ni.

dah selalu pun kita dengar kan?

ada tu sampai dah boleh hafal pun hadis ni.

tapi sejauh mana penghayatan kita terhadap apa yang telah kita tahu.

hurmm pe na jd la kan

kadang-kadang bila kita marah, kita perlu ingat. kita mesti cepat-cepat sedar bahawa bukan kita yang marah tu. yee, kita sebenarnya tenang. cakap kuat-kuat dalam hati. jerit jelas-jelas dalam hati kita yang kita ni bukan seorang pemarah.

pasangkan selalu niat pagi-pagi masa bangun tidur bahawa hari ini aku tak mahu marah. aku tak nak tensi-tensiON . aku nak senyum, aku nak hepi, aku nak gembirakan semua orang.

Buatlah setiap hari macam itu, insyaAllah lama-lama pasti berjayal lambat laun anda pasti berubah.

hurm ni g sy thu la kan.. huhu

slamat beramal suma

cheta di bulan ramadhan

ramadhan dtg ag wehhh

weee besh nyerrr sy rse sbb sy suka mse bulan ramadhan

pastu an leh raya huk3

acecehhh poce pun ta ckup esaited na raya plakk ann

ish3... apa na jd ngn budak skg

tp seyes bila ingt mse kecik2 dlu an adeshh klakanyaaa la haii

masuk je bulan na poce2 ni kan

mulahlahhh psg angan setinggi2 yg boleh

yela ayh kata spe pnuh leh dpt extra wet raya spew ta nak an

plak tu ustazah kata spe na masuk syurga kna poce

ta leh ponteng2 tipu2 aw.. huk3

so ngn jiwa murni n niat suci zmn n tika itu sgt seronokkk

igt ak festime org try na pose

aiyoooo mcm2 alasan g thu supaya ma kasi mamam

tp ma ta bg pun dye suh thn

tok mak kiter suh pose sekerat ari je

tp ta pe kite thn.. smpai tetido tegolek depn tv.. mse tu tadika ag la

dlu pose2 yang yuk pg2 buka periyok la kan

yg paling klaka tyme zmn nakal tu kan

hahhaa mser tu wat kuih.. ish3,.. na jdkan cheta i mkn curi u

puasa yg ke 25 mase umo lum tadika ok...

hak3,, pastu punya la bgga tyme tu sbb ta kntoi ngn spew

ceiiitt spe kta ta kntoi, my arwah moyang thu i ta pose la hari tu

hak3.. trus ta dpt wet raya that yer =(

adengan waktu sahur tu.. adeshhh liat nye mau bgun tuk sesuap nasi

seyes windu mse duk jay bee dlu

ma keje shif n ta mnentu so ayh la tok sgala cheff tuk kami

huk3,,, na thu kami mkn pe... ha..

juadah paling utama ialah daging berger

hahaha.... yg lain tu tmbahan jer

seyesss ayh tekebil2 bgun mau masak that berger tuk kami sahur

kitowang smpai tetido kt meja mkn

hak3

klo kt kg an lain plak chetanya

tokmak sungguh2 masak kelentang kelentung kt dapur

adeshhh kan pksa mkn byk wlopun mata ni bukak ckit je

pastu an pas mkn je trus baring2 depan tv n baca niat kuat2 walopun b4 tdo da wat gtu

ish3 esaitedd ma... kiter poce penuh since dajah satu

tp skang ni tettttttt

hahhaa

klo na cheta waktu siang tu haha klaka der suma tu

buat muka seposen smpai jd bidaan satu sen kot

kononla ngn harapan ayh bg bukak pose

harapan je la...

asal petang je ayh balik keje kan msi g bazar ramadhan

ta yh tya la sape yg esaited na beli.

msti la kiter an.. suma bnda la na beli

eh silap2 suma bnda na suh ayh n mak beli

yg paling wajib kan... air kathira jay beee

oiii spe org jay bee tp ta thu pasal air ni lehh cmpak dlm laut la bhai

hak3,,,

sedapp yg paling sedap yg jual kt area tmn dkt jln ke angsana

ye koettt lebeh sepuluh thun da hal ni. ta igt lakkk asenya

masuk je waktu bebuka ngn muka esaited thp gaban2

minum je 2 gelas air kan kiter terus kyang

ta smpay mkn kuih ngn nasi pun

maka pas solat mgrib hggalah na tdo

bwu lah mkn bnda2 berat

hak3.. ma kata lapo mata jer tuhhh bkn mkn punn

klo mkn bkn abesss punn

huk3

ishhh3.. klo na cheta byk koet

yg paling bermakna mse adeq yg gedix aka yg kurindu

na bkak pose at the fes time pose

ayh ptg tu jugak bwk men game kt angsana

hahaha,,, gler ar.. pastu mlm tu i paksa adeq i wat gtu ag supaya leh men game tu ag

skang da lain...

dlu ada ma n walid kejutkan sahur

ada tokmak n abah pggil tuk bgun sahur

sekarang......

masuk thun keempat kna bedikari

no more alarm or jam loceng yg sgt indah

"" ja,,,,, bgunn sahur""

ato pun'' angahhhh,, meh mkn nasi ni. t awak lapo""

bru la pwsan da besa pnjang da sy ni

ta leh na gedix2 cam selalu

huk3

apa2 pun pose tetap pose

la tahzan

menyedari hakikat sedih ini masih ada

mmbuat ak ta betah tuk bicara

menyusun lgkah dngan betulnya

Ya Allah..

ketahuilah hamba Mu ini terlalu lemah tuk semua ini

mncari diri yang hilang yg mgkin ak sniri yg bersembunyi

disebalik kebenaran yg ak simpan tuk berapa lama

mgkin ak tersalah mentafsir khilaf diri sndiri

ak sndiri yg terlalu alpha dgn sogokan dunia

plizzz dont ask me to be someone else

let me be myself

adakalanya ak ta past apa yg ak gusarkan

ak sniri ta mengerti apa yg ak bimbangkan

air mata ini seolah tdak peduli lg perasaan ku

jatuhnya ia bagai mogok dgn perasaan ku

apakahh ak tegar lakukan ini

sedangkan tiada kerelaan yg pasti

rsa bersalah yg mncgkam jiwa

kerana mndesak diri mnjadi yg seeloknya

walhal hati ini tiada siapa yg thu

merindui seseorang bernama teman tuk ak ceritakan

bkn ak kata tiada teman bersama ak

cuma hati ini mncari sumone yg da biasa mlihat ak menagis

sumone yg biasa melihat ak sperti ini

sumone yg akn biarkan ak menagis sepuasnya

melihat telatah tawa sahabat disisi mmbuat hati ini mula tersenyum

namun ku thu hati ini masih memerlukan masa tuk sembuh

hati ini terlalu luluh dan rapuhh

hingga satu saat mgkin ak akn biarkan shja hati ni

kejam kah ak jika bgitu

la tahzan faeza

itulah kata2 tuk driku

yg ku sekuat mgkin

nmun terkadang itu tangisan ini tetap jatuh

hati ini tetap gusar

hya KAU yg ketahu apa yg tersirat dihati

moga ak lebey tabah

insyaAllah

dan harapan ak tuk bulan ramadhan

agar ak kembali ke jalan Mu

tidak lg menoleh belakang mahupun

terfikir tuk kmbali di dlm kegelapan

ramadhan kali ni bgaikan cahaya

yg ku rindu tuk sinari hari2 ku

benci = cinta

Apa itu benci??

Benci itu bagaikan bunga yang menanti titisan air,

Sebab itu bila kita membenci, kita berharap ada yangmemahami..

Apa itu rindu??

Rindu itu bagaikan bunga yang tumbuh dalam kepala,

Sebab itu bila kita merindu, kita hampir jadi gila..

Apa itu cinta??

Cinta itu bagaikan bunga yang mekar ditepi jurang,

Sebab itu untuk dapatkan cinta, kita kena berani!!

Aku yg menyintai penciptaku,

p/s:teman,kemanisan&kebahagian dlm menyintai manusia hanya akn dpt dirasai

‘seandainya’ cinta itu berlandaskan cinta kpd pencipta&bersandarkan kpd

pegangan agama..buknla atas pegangan ‘janji’&nafsu semata2..

benci = cinta

Apa itu benci??

Benci itu bagaikan bunga yang menanti titisan air,

Sebab itu bila kita membenci, kita berharap ada yangmemahami..

Apa itu rindu??

Rindu itu bagaikan bunga yang tumbuh dalam kepala,

Sebab itu bila kita merindu, kita hampir jadi gila..

Apa itu cinta??

Cinta itu bagaikan bunga yang mekar ditepi jurang,

Sebab itu untuk dapatkan cinta, kita kena berani!!

Aku yg menyintai penciptaku,

p/s:teman,kemanisan&kebahagian dlm menyintai manusia hanya akn dpt dirasai

‘seandainya’ cinta itu berlandaskan cinta kpd pencipta&bersandarkan kpd

pegangan agama..buknla atas pegangan ‘janji’&nafsu semata2..

my heart need to under construction

i think im crazyy

wowww...

apakaaahhhh!!!!!

jgn2.. jgn muda erikut perasaan wehh

ilex2 dlu... ta lari mana la kowt klo btul ngn dia

haha sengonggg

plak ak kata ak in lab lab ngn sumone

ngekkk

ok tutup story kat atas tuhh malu derr

plak rse na publish kt snii

na cheta pasl sum one yg wat mata owng nangis mase cuti

haila3

its not kind na ungkit or kais balik cheta sejarah yg owg sniri da tnm dlm air

cuma sumtyme palew ni berfikirr

hati ni berkata

lidah ini mmbisuu

yakkssss ayt apakahh ituuu

mcm org ta betul ditinggalkan kekasih golap di bulan terang jew an

sumanya sbb diaaa

seyesli ak x seyes da ngn perasaan yg ada

klo tya sbb apa an

ayoooookkkkk

mybe taida jawapan ag bah

rse kekosongan selepas dia pergii

rse krinduan tuk merindu seseorang bergelar teman

mungkin terlalu lama dibuat pekasam

maka jeruk itu mnjerut tuannya snirii

my heart olwez beating lahhh

so sah2 i normal dri segi anatomy n physiology nya

what da fishhh mehhhhhhhhh

c im not great a troublemaker....

im only a gurl whom olwezz making trouble wif people arond me

they shud say im *****

haha.. did i care... hahhaa its ok

u all na ktupat wat ngumpat pun x per

mmg mulut manusia kan gtu haha sah2 ak pun tergolong kannn

ohh nooo

im blushingg

i think i like someone

hahhaa

gilerr

wink3

killing me inside

Hello, goodbye

I wanted to see, but I guess I

I don't have the strength to speak tonight

It's tricky sometimes

When you wanted to run, you'd always hide

You can't find the truth behind the lies

Another day and I'm on my feet, yeah

But the street feels like it's sleeping

I'm on a mission and it ain't too sweet

You're the reason I'm afraid

Said, you're the reason I'm afraid

But I want you to know

It's killing me

I think I gotta let go

Cause it's killing me

You're gonna do what you want

But you better believe

It's killing me

Love never dies

It's the reason that I won't compromise

But sometimes you fall before you fly

I've seen it coming for quite some time, man

I don't know what you're thinking

How can the two of us walk in stride

If we don't see eye to eye

You got me all messed up inside

Is it too late in the game

There is no one left to blame

I will always mention you

To the one that I pray to

Why can't you see that you're killing me

im hating myself bcoz i failed to ignore u

first thing first ok...

ak na nyatakan entry kali ni bkn lah sesi ktupat mampat or how to make lepat

its only a syndrome MANUSIA yg tgh rse x puas ati ngan manusia

aiyokkk..

rse geram thp na bnuh je nyamuk2 kt dunia..eh silap nyamuk plak ak cheta

ishhh sengetttt punya org....

x reti bertimbang rse ke hape

ok nmpk nya enjin turbo mrh da stat on on HIT..

ngeekkk apakaaahhh

kdg2 tu an

eeeeeeeeeeeeee

sumpa doe.. mrh giler ngn org cmni

tp na mrh2 sakan pun bkn dye dgr

haisshhhh hangin je der

plak klo den jmpa ag

mmg disect puas2 la kan..

tape2...

fuhhh... ad ke patut gitu

igt org lain ta terasa ke beb

mandat besar nmpak na wat gitu

adeshhhhh

na tunjuk tggi diri pun bkn kt sni lahh

stakat kt dunia ni,,,

alahhh ko tetap sma ngn kami

duduk sma tggi

berdiri sama rendah

ehh betul ke ayt ak niyhhhhh hahaha

apa2 pun.. bkn ak na sumpa2 ko jd katak ke hape

na maki2 ko smpai terbeliak mata ke jiwa

cuma harap one day ko sedar silap ko

one day ko thu na mntak maaf kt org yg ko wat silap

tu jerrr

hal ko ngn ak

ak kira 0-0

apa yg ko da wat ngn ak.. tu kira in da past

jgn wat ngn org lain der

naseb bek wat kt ak

klo org lain

perghhh agak2 mau terbakar tempat ko mastautin

sje je na suh u baca

bkn na ngata u dpn ramai3

tp na u thu ego setinggi alam pun leh cair sebyak lautan

klo u rse pkataan i ni mlampauuu atopun mgkin OVEERRRRR

TP igt at least i bg peringatan

wa x der la na biarkan lu sepah sorang2

bkn na tunjuk wa terer.. tp wa buat sbb wa syg lorhhh

haila3

esok2 kalo na susun kata

na atur lgkah

na buat apa2

fikir dlu

klo rse dri tu mmg emo

diri tu mmg ada klemahan

straight to the point...

jgn kata ta mo ngaku

pastu mau tunjuk terer

x ke lg nmpak buruk

bknnya dak kechik tuk dipimpin

bknnya budak dungu yg perlu diajar bekali2

bknnya x ngerti apa2 bila ditegur

so think it again my diorr

haha sekalinya ak bebel da mcm org tua kan

ke mmg ak dah tua

tape

semangat jiwa muda masih kental

hahaha

hoping u olwez noe i taking care wut ever u did

olwez looking after what u wanted so

wif luv...

((im hating u bcoz i failed to ignore u))

once i said yes we r friend

its olwezzz

n olwezz be